I just realized that there’s a lot of changes going on for the past week, but it’s calming down. Stressed, lack of sleep, lack of food, slacking off on school, not paying enough attention to my kids at work & all that. I’m surprised that I was able to get it through. It was definitely one hell of a ride that I have never rode on before. Even tho, in the back of my head, the ride isn’t over. But I know it’s definitely my last time riding on it. I know I said no more turning back before, but my action slipped.. This time, I realized big time & what I got myself into. Into unnecessary things that I don’t need to worry or be concerned about all the freakin’ time when I have way more important things that I need to keep my eye on. It might sound a little silly that I’m saying this so early when everything happened recently, but still, if I don’t say it out loud to myself, I might end up putting myself into a deeper whole. It is what it is & I just have to take a deep breath & accept it. Just accept it. Walk away & just leave it as it is.
The only thing I should really be focusing on is my family, school & work. I do feel happy that I can actually help my mother out in certain ways. Coming home & having dinner together makes me really happy. haha tonight was definitely a night to look forward after work. There was hotpot! Yum! It’s been a while. Sis & my cute mommy was drinking Moscato AGAIN. lol Think she (my mom) had half a cup & when she looked up, she was hella red! Then she started giggling. lol Asking silly questions. haha Too funny, sis & I just had to record it. lol This is something that I love to come home too. Having fun with my family, simple dinner, just us. :) I know I just turned 20, but I can’t wait for my next birthday so that I can drink with my family & my cousins again. lol It would actually be fun to get drunk with my family. Just 1 more year!
I really wanna finish whatever the hell I have to finish & get out of here. I don’t really care where I go now, but as long as I finish, I’m good. Still haven’t got all that quite figured out, but I will soon. I’m really looking forward to become a wedding planner. The more I think about it, the more I can see myself helping a happy couple planning their wedding. :) sighh… too bad we can’t fast forward to see how it really happens. hehehe It’s okay, I’ll find out when the time comes.
I don’t know how work is going to turn out. I can sense a lot of changes going on at work too & if anything, I don’t think I would be able to handle as a director. :/ I enjoy working there, but all these changes make me feel kinda uneasy.. lol I like what I’m doing. Let’s just hope everything will turn out to be alright. Gotta enjoy what’s good now, right? Anyways, gotta wake up early so I must sleeeeeeeep!
